Counsellor’s Corner: What’s Your Focus?

Tim ChanTimes News

As we are weeks into self-isolation and social distancing, you may have noticed a shift in your own mental state. What likely started as a positive perspective- an overdue staycation, an extension of Spring Break- has now changed. The atmosphere in the home has also likely shifted, and maybe more days than not, is now taking on a slightly more negative tone than before.

This week, I listened to a podcast where John Maxwell spoke on Focus. Within the pandemic, he described how we as parents can be leaders of our household based on what we focus on. He continued by saying that we can be leaders of our family and have internal peace by asking ourselves three questions each day.

These daily questions were:

  1. What is my responsibility?
  2. What are my priorities?
  3. What are my possibilities?

These questions help us to see the bigger picture. These questions also help us to be intentional with our day. By taking the time to think about how we as parents want to live- impacting our own wellbeing, and that of our children- we create new possibilities. When we structure our day and actually do things that we set out to do, our moods shift and we have more positive thoughts about ourselves and others. That being said, there are often too many things we think we should do, try to do, and expect ourselves to do in a day. These daily ‘to do’s’ add up to too many things and often cause unnecessary stress when we try to do it all.

So, instead of trying to do a week’s work in a day’s time, prioritize and boost your mental state. Out of the laundry list of items, reduce and FOCUS. Minimize the pressures and prioritize your day, your work, and your time with your kids. Be present in today, trusting that God goes before you and will take care of tomorrow.

Be blessed!

Romans 12:1-2
“So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fi t into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.”

Resources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/joyful-parenting/202003/behavioral-activation-prevent-depression-duringcovid-
19

https://thrive-life.ca/coping-in-the-midst-of-covid-19-mental-health-scaffolding-for-the-family/
Online workshop: https://events.thrive-life.ca/living-room-learning